Slow to Anger, Rich in Kindness, Loving and Forgiving

At Mass this past Sunday, July 19^th we heard this responsorial psalm:

Psalm 86: 5-6, 9-10, 15-16

You, O LORD, are good and forgiving,
abounding in kindness to all who call upon you.
Hearken, O LORD, to my prayer
and attend to the sound of my pleading.
R. Lord, you are good and forgiving.

All the nations you have made shall come
and worship you, O LORD,
and glorify your name.
For you are great, and you do wondrous deeds;
you alone are God.
R. Lord, you are good and forgiving.

You, O LORD, are a God merciful and gracious,
slow to anger, abounding in kindness and fidelity.
Turn toward me, and have pity on me;
give your strength to your servant.
R. Lord, you are good and forgiving.

I have been a Mom for 30 years. It is by far the biggest blessing of my life to be a Mom. I have two daughters; my firstborn will be 31 in November and my youngest will be 17 in October. The experience of being a Mom has taught me the most lessons of all so far in life.

For anyone who is a parent, I don’t have to tell you that being a parent can test your patience and can cause you moments of stress. For those of you who are not parents, I am sure you can imagine how it can test your patience and cause stress. For many years in my parenting journey I would fuss over little things and lose my patience with my daughters. Just about every time I found myself being impatient or making a big deal over a situation, I would end up regretting my reactions after the situation passed.

During a Sunday Mass about four years ago, God worked in me through a song that really caused a shift in me as a Mom. The same psalm we heard this past Sunday was the responsorial psalm at this Mass. The choir sang Loving and Forgiving at Communion time based on Psalm 86.

 

Loving and Forgiving– Scott Soper

Slow to anger, rich in kindness,
Loving and forgiving are you.

Bless the holy name of God.
All my being bless the Lord,
Remembering the goodness of God.
Healing those who live in pain,
Saving us from final death.
God fills us with goodness and love.
Slow to anger, rich in love.
God remembers not our sins;
Forgiving and loving is God.
So great the love of God for us.
As far as east is from west,
The Lord takes our sins from us.

Loving and forgiving are you.

As the song was being sung tears began to slowly run down my cheeks. I thought about all the times I was quick to get angry with my girls over little things. I also thought about the times I was unkind or bitter toward them. I reflected on times I felt I was not being loving or forgiving with them. I remember thinking people were probably looking at me as they walked back to their pews from Communion wondering what was wrong with this lady crying in her seat.

It might seem so small a moment, a song at Mass during Communion, for God to make such an impact on me.

The line in the song “slow to anger, rich in kindness. Loving and forgiving” became my mantra for being a Mom from that Sunday forward. I also started telling my daughters the same when I would referee their disagreements with each other.

Last week I told my younger daughter I was going to be writing a reflection for work about my “Mom saying” and she immediately said “Oh. Slow to anger, rich in kindness. Loving and forgiving.” I smiled and said “Yes, that one.”

I try to apply the mantra in all my interactions with my daughters and husband as well as with all other people I meet. Stop and think about the multiple times in a day when a situation gets your blood boiling and tests your patience, even just a little bit, such as a person cutting in front of you when you are driving, someone speaking rudely to you without any provoking, or someone saying hurtful words. For me, I know when I start to clench my teeth, feel my shoulders tense up and the temptation rises in me to lash out with a response to another person I immediately try to shift my thoughts and say to myself “slow to anger, rich in kindness. Loving and forgiving”.

Might I suggest the idea the next time you feel yourself getting angry at another person; stop and try to emulate God’s example to us from Psalm 86 and be slow to anger, rich in kindness, loving and forgiving. You might be amazed at the results.